RRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
I realise that it's not a problem with MY R's that make me sound like Jonathan Ross, but it's the Russian's R's that are so pronounced in comparison to my own, phew... I thought I had developed some crazy speech impediment but it turns out they're the crazy ones with their over emphasised Rrrrrrrrrrs.
Hey guess who came in to the office to ask for English lessons, yeah, none other than Leo Tolstoy. Imagine my surprise when there he was asking for me personally to teach him the Great English Language. I asked him if he has ever spoken English before and he said no, so I suggested that for our first lesson we should learn how to introduce ourselves (well I already know how to introduce myself but I thought maybe I could teach him). He said, 'No Rebecca, I want for my first lesson to translate this'; and he plonked down a big bundle of handwritten manuscripts entitled 'Anna Karenina' onto the table. Well, Ok I said.
Haha a funny thing happened. My Bond villain and I have been working our way through a textbook and one of the tasks was to discuss a story that had been written called 'the perfect crime'. Well, her eyes lit up when she saw the topic. She also told me that she has read Agatha Christie. Bond villain for sure. Anyway we discussed the perfect crime which turned out not to be a perfect crime after all but some unbelievable story about a woman killing her husband with an ice sculpture and then when the police arrive they all drink brandy and use the ice from the ice sculpture to cool themselves down.. uh, yeah. So, it seems the key to a perfect crime is to get the police inspectors who are dealing with the case drunk on brandy. I looked at the authour who turned out to be Roald Dahl and then it all made sense. I think Bond Villain was slightly disappointed too, I think she had been hoping for some tips.
Hey guess who came in to the office to ask for English lessons, yeah, none other than Leo Tolstoy. Imagine my surprise when there he was asking for me personally to teach him the Great English Language. I asked him if he has ever spoken English before and he said no, so I suggested that for our first lesson we should learn how to introduce ourselves (well I already know how to introduce myself but I thought maybe I could teach him). He said, 'No Rebecca, I want for my first lesson to translate this'; and he plonked down a big bundle of handwritten manuscripts entitled 'Anna Karenina' onto the table. Well, Ok I said.
Haha a funny thing happened. My Bond villain and I have been working our way through a textbook and one of the tasks was to discuss a story that had been written called 'the perfect crime'. Well, her eyes lit up when she saw the topic. She also told me that she has read Agatha Christie. Bond villain for sure. Anyway we discussed the perfect crime which turned out not to be a perfect crime after all but some unbelievable story about a woman killing her husband with an ice sculpture and then when the police arrive they all drink brandy and use the ice from the ice sculpture to cool themselves down.. uh, yeah. So, it seems the key to a perfect crime is to get the police inspectors who are dealing with the case drunk on brandy. I looked at the authour who turned out to be Roald Dahl and then it all made sense. I think Bond Villain was slightly disappointed too, I think she had been hoping for some tips.
posted by Girl Least Likely To at Tuesday, March 21, 2006
12 Comments:
Roald Dahl wrote the screenplay for You Only Live Twice, maybe she was hoping for some kind of Blofeld character?
Anna Karenina? didn't she use to be a tennis player?? I think the first thing you should teach this Tolstoy fellow (if that is his real name) is to write about high class love & romance, with the odd affair and a hint of revolution and Christianity.
Wasn't Blofeld in DangerMouse?
nope, that was Penfold.
i thought in the roald dahl (tales of the unexpected) the murder weapon was a frozen leg of lamb and the woman (the murderer) cooked it and fed it to the police so they ate the evidence
ah, maybe it was adapted, because it wasn't very good. It was a bad bad story.
when people post comments anonymously, does it annoy you or does it provide you with a entertaining game of guess who?
I just figured it was the same guy that wrote all those old poems??
Well it would be good if people revealed themselves, but I've given up guessing - I just presume it's my brother unless they put their name. Who's this? And what poems, which guy?
Not always me. The funny and/or clever ones are me of course :)
You never saw any of those old poems where they were credited to "Anon"?
That's what I was getting at anyway.
quite often it's me,
Jus
...said a quiet voice from the back!
You always have the courtesty to leave your name tho Jus
actually, i rarely do these days! must be getting slack in my old age. the question about annon postings was mine, for example!
would also like to say that us 23rd january-ers are v good communicators, anon or not!
jus x
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